Blogging? What's blogging?

I know I have been sorely vacant from the blogging world, but forgive me. I have much to catch up on and I have several partially completed posts, but "our" internet is on the fritz--or should I say our neighbor's wireless signal isn't reaching us as strongly as it was in the past. But once I post all these, you better read fast to keep up with me. Ha ha!

Our Christmas Jar

The evening started out like any other night--diaper changes, last drinks, chasing a half-dressed Rain around the house, trying to complete her night ensemble. Then after herding her to her room, it was tickle time and then prayers. We were just kneeling down when the dogs started barking and Shane went to see what had set them to barking. It's not unusual for that time of night as there is the occasional neighbor walking a dog, or a teenager that roars around our corner that gets the dogs excited. Shane went to tell them to be quiet while I finished saying prayers with Rain.

When Shane got back, he had a silly grin on his face. He handed me a book, wrapped in gold ribbon. I had seen the book before, and had even wanted to read it, but hadn't quite ever run into it again to do so. It was called Christmas Jars by Jason F. Wright. I thought that was a nice gift and asked who had left it. Then I realized that Shane still had his hand behind his back. Sure, I thought, keep the cookies to yourself, and give me the book. Probably a fair trade at our house.

 Then, he pulled out from behind him a huge glass jar filled to the brim with silver coins and green bills. Whoa, I thought. That's a lot of money. Most of the silver coins were quarters. I asked again who had left it. Shane said some teenager that he had never seen before had given it to him. Shane wanted to give it back to him, but the kid said that somebody else had asked him to deliver it to us. Truly anonymous.

At first I thought it was my mom because the handwriting was so familiar, but after a little sleuthing, and flat-out asking, I found out it wasn't her. So, somewhere, out there, is a family that I owe a heartfelt --

THANK YOU!

The questions tumbled around in my mind that night. Who? Why? How can I repay . . . someone for this gift? After the girls were in bed, I sat on the couch in the silence staring at the jar and the book. Then I started reading. I read the entire book right then, even though the dishes weren't done and the toys weren't picked up yet. Tears rolled down my cheeks. Shane, who had fallen asleep on the floor amid the day's tornado of toys, woke to my sniffling and soggy shirt cuffs.

This year has been one of faith and prayers. It's one of the reasons that Mesa's middle name is Faith. Shane hasn't had actual employment since May and every month we have seen many miracles that have helped us get through to see the next one.

It's also been a challenge to be on the receiving end of service, gifts, and help. But there is also a lesson to be learned in receiving and it brings good growth. Even if we don't have a lot right now, I want to help others where I can, and when we are more on our feet, I want to help even more. I am thankful for a gospel that teaches us to look out for one another. We shouldn't tear each other down, or be spiteful, if someone else succeeds. It may be that success that will help you out in your own low spot at some point. And when you do succeed, you can help others. We are all in this journey together and I hope I can be better at giving someone a hand when they need a little lift. I know I need it now and again.

Tangled Forest

The other day we went for a spontaneous family hot dog roast

while the uncles worked on building a corral.

 Rain absolutely adores her cousin, River.

They immediately found each other.

Hand in hand, they set off on a marvelous adventure
through the tangled forest to find the sticky swamp.

HUP, two, three, four!

First, they had to conquer the tangled forest.

"Wriver! Whey yare you?"

"Over here!"

Finally, success!

Next, it was the Canyon-With-Only-One-Way-Out, which was UP!

And UP we went,
clamoring, sliding, clinging, grabbing, dragging, and carrying.

Rain turned out to be quite the hiker and didn't want much help
from the rest of us. She is Little Miss Independent these days.

We grown-ups were invited merely for the fact that

they needed a little help traversing the area.

The girls had fun climbing up the sandbanks and sliding back down.

River was a very constructive mentor for Rain

The two younger cousins enjoyed the warmth of a perfect fall outing.

Believe me, it's a challenge to hold a little one on your hip, navigate a camera and take semi-decent pictures, all the while trying not to impale the said little one with the newly cut--and sharpened--hot dog roasting sticks that are somehow entwined in your fingers, the crook of your elbow, or poking out of a pocket. Somehow we all managed.

Watching my mom help on our adventure, it made me remember all the Saturday "Bentures" we had growing up. I'm sure I always did my share of complaining about things not being perfect--the sand in my shoes, or my hot dog falling into the fire, or the smoke in my eyes--but I remember my mom always being so cheerful about being out, doing something together as a family. Now I'm a mom and I get the challenge of tackling not-so-perfect circumstances and still being positive.

When we returned after giving up on the Sticky Swamp, the little explorers were ready for some grub. But first we had to roust the uncles away from their work.

If one little girl in a hole is fun . . .

. . . then two little girls in a hole is even more fun!

Yum, hot dogs, finally. River wanted both varieties--
cooked and uncooked.

"Hey, how come you got two, I only got one."  

This was a good day!

Six months already

Mesa went in for her 6 month well-baby check-up at the beginning of the month. (It's taken me so long to post this that she is only a few days shy of 7 months--unbelievable). She is growing a lot -- I know, because she is getting super heavy to pack around. It's no wonder my hips are always out of wack, when they are always cocked one way or the other with almost 20 lbs latched to them. I take that back, not latched, more like balanced, because for some reason my children don't know how to hold onto ME, I'm always holding onto THEM. So anyway, here are some stats:

Weight: 18.5 lbs  (90th percentile)

Height: 27-3/4 in  (95th percentile)

Head: Sorry, didn't catch what she said.

I was trying to entertain Rain at the moment.

This little girl is just as loveable as the first one. Mesa is actually probably more laid back than Rain was. Mesa likes to chill with Daddy and she is very forgiving of Rain who tries to love and take care of her, but does a good job of mauling and squishing, sprinkled with hugs and kisses. Rain even occasionally shares her binky with Mesa. Pure sister love, that's all I can say.

Mesa LOVES to eat graham crackers. She has an obsession with food. She eats at least two HUGE bowls of cereal with applesauce or a pack of baby food--and screams when it's gone. At in the middle of there she eats pieces of bread, mom, bananas, graham crackers, mom, and anything else she can get her little chubby fingers on. She is getting more precise at grabbing things between her finger and thumb.

She has kept me up at night a lot lately but hopefully those stubborn teeth will poke through and we will once more see a little less of each other during the wee hours of the night. Last night was a major improvement since she had very little sleep throughout the day and was exhausted. But I still love her to pieces and her little giggles make it all worth it.  

Humility

Being sick is one of the many humbling experiences during this mortal experience. I am so lethargic and unproductive that it frustrates me. All the household things start slipping and I find that I lean on the crutch of movies to pass the time with as few disturbances as possible. I feel even worse because I feel like I am wasting my life when I am sick. It's at that point that I begin promising myself, and the Lord, that I will be SOOO much more productive with my time, if I could only get over this current ailment. I also find myself cheering myself on when I get something done while I'm sick. Then it's one less thing I will have to do when I get better.


The second thing that brings humility is not getting a full night's rest. Mesa has been waking up 3 or 4 times a night and lately even 5 or 6 times. She could be teething, although for as long as it's been going on, I would have expected to see at least a little tiny tooth . . . but NOTHING. She got some vaccinations last week, but she seems to be over that. The final option is that she has the cold that my whole family got. Despite my best efforts in trying to sanitize and keep her from getting it, I was defeated. With the whole stuffy nose business, she can't take a binky very well because she can't breath. When I am so exhausted and she wakes up, I groan, thinking how tired I am. I go to her crib and look down, seeing those bright eyes staring at me in the darkness when I wish that they were closed. I wrap her up again and start rocking her, trying to keep from dropping her as I half-doze walking up and down the hall. It's humbling.

If my day goes by, and I've only emptied the dishwasher and maybe done one load of laundry, I try to find excuses like "the girls are sick and more fussy," or "if only I had got a good night's sleep, I would've had the energy to get more done." But if I look at the big picture and assume that I only have to be productive on days that EVERYONE in house is in perfect health, and I got a full night's rest the night before, then there will be a lot of unproductiveness in my life. The hard part is to still work through those days getting as much as done as I can, with as much of a smile and cheerful attitude that I can muster, knowing that I tried my best and that the Lord expects nothing more.

Watering the Deer . . . I mean, Cows

It's been really dry in our area and all the cows on the cattle permits are running out of water. There hasn't been any rain to fill the catchments and storage tanks, so my parents have to haul water EVERYDAY, and sometimes twice a day to water their cows. However, not only is the water running out for the cows, it is also running our for the mule deer population on the Buckskin.

Rain was content to stay in the back of the truck for about three minutes.

Then she wanted to be closer. 

So as my parents haul water, it is not uncommon to see the deer coming in to lick the water off the water trailer, or mill among the cows trying to get a drink. The water was so scarce, the cows were even chasing the deer off of it.

 Can you spot the deer?

One afternoon my two girls and I went on an adventure with "PacaMa" to haul water. We bounced and jostled over the dirt road as the water trailer sloshed and shoved behind us. We finally reached our destination, and sure enough, there were the cows, and the deer, waiting for us.

Rain enjoyed watching the cows, and I had to keep pulling her back as she was intent on running up and petting their faces--probably more like poking their eyes and tugging at their ears, which is her favorite anatomy lesson she likes to recite with any animal, creature, creepy crawly, etc that comes within her reach.

After filling up the water troughs, we sat back and watched the cows get their fill and the deer coming in to get their share.

 We also found a carcass of a deer that had been butchered out since this was all during the deer hunts. While most little girls pick bouquets of flowers, my little girl enjoys bouquets of deer legs. She loved to pet it softly and tickle its toes.  

(Don't ask me where she gets this since I am usually there in the middle of it trying to catch that "hopper" for her, or show her the lizard before it runs away, or the rattlesnake that "Paca" killed.)

Both the girls were pretty good troopers throughout the whole adventure. 

 

Green pumpkins

I'm not a huge fan of Halloween. I would much rather play games as a family than try and think of a costume and brave the trick-or-treating crowds. But as a Mommy, I thought I should at least try to get in the Halloween spirit for Rain.

So, I bought pumpkins--around the first week of October. I was bound and determined to carve pumpkins. I bought a big one and a little one. I brought them home and set them on my counter. "Look Rain, PUMPKINS!" So big and orange. Well, days passed and between chasing cows, building corrals, cutting cedar posts, and life in general, they sat on my counter--faceless--yet I could feel their eyes boring into me every time I walked past them, or pushed them this way or that way to make room on the counter for food, playdoh, or coloring books. The day I would plan to carve them, would be the night that Shane didn't get home until after the girls were in bed.

Halloween loomed nearer and I noticed a strange phenomenon. My pumpkins were turning GREEN! . . . and not from mold. How could a pumpkin that was bright orange when I bought it, grow chronologically backwards and turn unripe, I wondered. Now my pumpkins didn't have faces, nor were they even the right color. 

Well, October 30th dawned, and I told Shane we were carving pumpkins that night, with or without him. Daddy made a special effort to be home and we carved our green pumpkin. Rain enjoyed playing with her "cumpin," and the candle inside was an extra cool idea for her. So for Halloween we had a carved green pumpkin face, roasted seeds, and went to the ward Trunk-or-Treat. Rain was a little camo girl on behalf of Uncle Joe who is in the Marines boot camp.

One of the first costumes she saw at the Trunk or Treat was a gorilla who tried to give her a piece of candy. It petrified her and for days after, all she could repeat was "scary monkey" over and over. Several days later, I unthinkingly checked out Tarzan from the library. Probably not the best timing. Maybe she'll enjoy it better another time.

Rapunzel, Rapunzel

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your long hair" . . . What? You cut your hair? Yes, I did and I promised pictures of my haircut, so here are a few. I was going to show a picture of it done curly too, but thought I better post what I have or I might never get to it. I miss my long hair, but I am enjoying having it shorter.

I had about 8 inches cut off, which I donated, and had my hair thinned a little more. Now that there isn't so much weight, my curls are starting to spring back to life. I had talked about getting a haircut for a long time. I knew it was time, but wasn't ready to face it. Everytime we would walk past someone with really short hair, I would always tease Shane --"How about if I cut my hair like that?" He would always glare at me and say "you better not." He said it was okay if I cut my hair, but it couldn't go above my shoulders. Like I would be brave enough to go any shorter. It took my sister and two aunts to help me cut this much off.

I decided to wait on trying bangs for awhile yet. Maybe after another two kids I will be ready. =)

Maybe we'll see a bird . . .

The other day Rain wanted to go for a walk. I agreed--we had been cooped up in the house and needed to get out. So, I was putting coats and shoes on, and then there were diapers to be changed, etc. While changing Rain's diaper, I was making up a song trying to distract her long enough to get the job done.

(make up any tune you want . . . I did)

Goin' for a walk

Goin' for a walk

What do you think we'll see?

What do you think we'll see?

Maybe we'll see a bird

Maybe we'll see a bird

. . .

Now all bundled up, we headed out the door. But what should we come upon as soon as we opened the front gate, fluttering around helplessly on the driveway . . . but a bird. Of course, Rain's new thing is to "hode it". I tried to catch it and put the poor thing out of its misery. It must have flown into the side of our house. After catching it, Rain held it "carefully" while I tried to decide how to deal with it humanely and without breaking Rain's heart. She absolutely loved it and named all its parts.

Thankfully Nature ran its course, very quickly, and the bird died while she was holding it. But it went on our walk around the entire neighborhood.

Unfortunately, after the walk was over, Rain STILL didn't want to relinquish her newfound friend. I said she could hold it as long as she stayed outside. This would have been fine-- except she stepped in a big mud puddle in yard and started crying because she was dirty. (I don't know how I could have a child that dislikes being dirty so much.) So, I had to strip her outside, pry the lifeless bird out of her hands, and put her directly into the tub. She didn't stop screaming about her bird for at least a half hour. At bedtime, she finally consoled herself with the fact that it was dark outside and the bird "went night-night."

Look at me-- I'm a Blogger!

In reading the name of my new blog, I hope you don't get the impression that I live in "Paradise" where my life is perfect. Perhaps it would be more appropriately named "In Search of Paradise." However, all the blogs with the name "Finding    (insert word here)   " with such words as Happiness, Joy, Peace, etc were all taken. No, this blog is more along the line of everyday adventures of trying to put ponytails in a runaway toddler while trying to find happiness NOW. As you will come to notice, I'm not always very successful in getting the ponytails in and a lot of the pictures will be "wild and free."

I have felt for awhile now that I should start a blog--maybe because all my friends have one, or maybe because it will ease the guilt about being horrible at keeping a journal, but probably more because my girls are growing up so fast and I don't to miss it. I know it sounds cliche, but I didn't think it would happen to me. Sure, there are long days, and even longer nights, but I can tell already that these days will be gone long before I'm ready.